August 11, 2012: Post 578 (2012 Day 224) - Cheat Day
August 11, 2012
Daily Comment
Why do I abandon common sense so often?
I'm not really certain. According to my beliefs, it happens because on some below the conscious level, the argument for stupidity is winning.
That is how it seems to me, but in hindsight, it might actually be because (again, at that level below my awareness), I can't come up with an argument to be smart. The reason would seem to be the consequences.
Historically, the consequences for indulging in behavior that would seem to be against my own interests have been negative only in the short-term, if at all. Not that there are no negative consequences. Far from it, although, again, sometimes they can be circumvented, and sometimes their effects are only felt briefly.
The first thing going on here is that I rely on my subconscious and unconscious thoughts, which always dominate over my conscious ones, to know what's best. If that means I have to experience something uncomfortable as a result of something else I did, then I guess that is what I'm supposed to experience, and, somewhere on the path, the stupid thing I did, and the pain it caused me, will have a beneficial impact.
All my evidence of this is anecdotal, and really, it is my dogma, and is hard to defend, intellectually. I am an over-the-top optimist, except when I am swimming in the kind of fear that causes me to forget who I really am.
I have found that, when the fear subsides, I usually find that whatever situation pulled me into that black place, was vital to create some positive thing in the aftermath.
The last time this happened was when my second marriage failed, and I was left homeless and in debt. At the point where this all came to pass, and it was very sudden, and the revelation of the dire situation I was in came as such a shock, that I was left reeling, and very, very afraid.
Without that happening, I would never have come to Syracuse. And living in Syracuse turned out to be one of those things I would never have imagined would be in my life that has been a very good thing for me, and enabled many positive things that would have other-wise never have occurred.
Which brings me to the second thing, very much related to the first, and to my overall optimistic disposition: I believe things turn out for the best. Again, this is dogma, not scientifically verified. I really do believe we live in a safe Universe, not one that constantly puts our lives and souls in peril.
In a sense, I believe that the Universe (which, lets face it, is within and without, and which is only separate from us in the material world) conspires in our favor. Even if it takes many lifetimes in the time-space domain to work that out.
What does it have to do with me abandoning common sense, behaving stupidly and against my best interests? At some level, I believe that can't happen, and isn't, in the big picture, what is happening at all.
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Food and Diet Section
Today's Weight: 206.8 lbs
Yesterday's Weight: 205.0 lbs
Day Net Loss/Gain: + 1.8 lbs
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| Year 2012 daily weight from December 31, 2011. |
Diet Comment:
My cheating midnight snack undid what might have otherwise been a recovery day, and my weight is up, in front of a cheat day. It didn't bode well, and the way I ate today (as if I weren't going to have the opportunity ever again) probably means a disastrous post-cheat weigh-in.
Luckily, I will have the opportunity to get back on track, because I will survive this period of indulgence and temptation-yielding and do what I know how to do.
Luckily, I will have the opportunity to get back on track, because I will survive this period of indulgence and temptation-yielding and do what I know how to do.
Food Log
Breakfast
Lunch
At a picnic at Arrow Park in Orange County, I had:
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| On the road: Second Nature Wholesome Medley (dark chocolate chunks, roasted and salted peanuts, almonds and cashews, tart red cherries and dried cranberries). |
At a picnic at Arrow Park in Orange County, I had:
- Hummos
- Guacamole
- Corn tortilla chips
- Rye bread
- Asparagus and feta cheese spread
- Roast Beef and Cheddar club sandwich
- Feta cheese and Sun-dried tomato spread
- Ice cream
- Cookies
- Cake
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| On the road: Second Nature Wholesome Medley (dark chocolate chunks, roasted and salted peanuts, almonds and cashews, tart red cherries and dried cranberries). Not shown: A silly amount of Nutter Butters. |
Liquid Intake
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posted by Reverend Ken at
12:24 PM
3 Comments:
Do you relly think that the universe is concerned with the details of your personal life? That sounds like a very ego-centric outlook I think that as far as the universe is concerned, we are born to transform substances end energies necessary for world maintenance, and evolutionary transformation for its' own purpose, whether or not we are happy while doing so.. And then we die. I look to find "happiness" by learning how to accept the situation that is thrust upon me,as it is,and to adjust and find peace through lowered expectations and demands in terms uf how I want or think the world or universet should accomodate my ego needs.
I don't think the Universe is concerned one way or the other with the details of my or anyone else's life.
I think the Universe and I (and you, and everyone, and everything) is of the same stuff, and therefore not hostile. Benevolent in the same way my instinct for self-preservation could be looked at as benevolent towards my life - in a sense, they are on and the same.
That's a very good succinct answer. I agree and like the way you think..
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