January 7, 2013

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January 7, 2013 (Monday)
(Post 704, Day 7 of 2013, 738 days since starting this blog)

 

January 6, 2013 - Fast Day

January 6, 2013 (Sunday)
(Post 703, Day 6 of 2013, 737 days since starting this blog)

Daily Comment

Just another lazy, bad-weather day spent avoiding any and all constructive activity.

  

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First-half year 2013 daily weight from December 31, 2012

Food and Diet Section

 Today's Weight:        206.8 lbs 

Yesterday's Weight:    203.6 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:     + 3.2 lbs

Diet Comment

With one of the longest days of cheating in recent memory - breakfast, which I usually skip on weekends, to late-night snack - I guess I'm more than okay with the result. Today's fast will be relatively short - 18-1/2 hours - thanks to that midnight snack last night.

Food Log

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch
Skipped.

Dinner (Break-fast)
Cocoa-kale protein shake (almond milk, whey protein (36g protein), kale, chia gel, cocoa, cinnamon, stevia-inulin blend)

Snack
Broccoli slaw and two hard-boiled eggs, baby carrots and home-made mayonnaise..

Liquid Intake   

   Coffee:  32 oz,  Water:  92+ oz.

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January 5, 2013 - Cheat Day

January 5, 2013 (Saturday)
(Post 700, Day 5 of 2013, 736 days since starting this blog)

Daily Comment

Today I want to write about a person who was, more than my parents, my first mentor.

Marlene Feingold was, among so many other things, an elementary school teacher, a musician, an iconoclast and a free-thinker, a political activist, and an example to generations of young people that living with your own ideas was at least as likely, if not more so, to lead to a successful life as conforming to your parents' societal ideals.

I met her when I was nine years old. My mother had met her a few years earlier while president of the PS 209 PTA. Miss Feingold was a fifth-grade teacher and 209's music teacher. While Mom was substitute teaching on her way to becoming a teacher herself, she asked Miss Feingold to give her kids music lessons. She taught me guitar, my brother and sister recorder. 

At the time, I was having a very difficult time in 4th grade, where I had been put in the 'slow' class after having skipped third grade. Marlene was very into folk music, but had formal music training as well. I had two books to study from: a paperback of folk songs and the Segovia classical guitar method.

My music lessons were a combination of her disciplining me, explaining the assignments to me, and listening to my complaints.

She was the first person to ever tell me to think for myself. She was the first person to put the idea in my head that just because everybody does something, just because everybody believes something, doesn't mean it is the right thing to do, or to believe without question.

That blew my ten-year-old mind.

One of my most vivid memories is of a time when she was rehearsing the glee club. She had the stronger singers anchoring their sections, and seated each section in a different row. After giving us our parts, she had each row sing their part one-at-a-time. When my row sang, I sang one thing, everybody else in the row sang something different. All the students laughed. I felt embarrassed, lacking the confidence to believe I was right and everybody else was wrong. 

As if reading my mind, Marlene asked the rest of the students to raise their hands if they thought everybody in the row but me was singing the right thing. A few hands were raised, then more, and then almost everybody raised their hands, at which point she pointedly said, that, like the other singers in the row, the majority was wrong, I was the only one singing the right part.

Fifty-two years later, I remember the way that incident made me feel, what that vindication meant to me in my life.

When my sister was out of elementary school, and I had already started high school, I didn't see much of her, and when, after I graduated high school and my parents moved out of the PS 209 neighborhood, I didn't see her at all for a few years until she came for a condolence visit when my mother died.

It was about twenty years later when I happened to run across her again. By then, I was living in upstate New York, and arranged to visit her. She had retired from teaching. She asked about my brother, who she had taught in fifth grade, and who she remembered with great fondness. And she told me she had come out as a lesbian. That she had been afraid to do that while she was still in the school system, and had trepidations about what others of her former students would think of her.

I told her it was a sign of respect that everybody had thought she was a lesbian all the time, and nobody had gossiped or put her down for it.

I also told her how fondly I remembered her and how important she had been to me.

We kept in touch, from time to time, over the years since, pretty much via email and later, on Facebook. She was an activist in the LGBT community, had formed a politically-themed music group, was also active in the animal rights movement, and never, ever lost her sense of humor.

In fact, I would be very remiss to not mention her sense of humor - it was off-beat, and she was unafraid to be humorous in 'serious' situations. As a teacher, she incorporated humor in the classroom to a degree I (who never had her for a regular teacher in elementary school - that was my brother Andy's draw) I never experienced in my academic career. When I was in fifth grade, she made up a student, her whole class collaborated in the hoax, and it was a source of great amusement. I also saw a test she gave, and it included a question about Lassie rescuing Jeff (pre-Timmy kid owner) from a bull by running around the bull with a red cloth. The answer was that this couldn't happen, because dogs are color-blind. 

Decades later, we traded jokes online.

She was the single most important musical influence in my life, and, at least as important, was the first and last mentor I ever had. She was as influential as my parents in making me what I am today.

RIP Marlene. We who you touched are saddened by your passing, and our world is diminished by your no longer being of it.

  

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First-half year 2013 daily weight from December 31, 2012

Food and Diet Section

 Today's Weight:        203.6 lbs 

Yesterday's Weight:    203.4 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:     + 0.2 lbs

Diet Comment

What a weird food day yesterday was. I successfully fasted for 23 hours, then I ate for the next 7 hours, beginning and ending with a quarter-pound of pepperoni. In between, nothing but vegetarian stuff (except for the mayonnaise, which includes an egg and yogurt among the ingredients). I guess the only surprising thing about the gain in weight was how little it was. I would call it a push.

Today's first cheat of the year starts out with a solid, non-cheat breakfast, and goes downhill from there.

Food Log

Breakfast

Chicken with feta and spinach sausages with Rajma Masala (red kidney bean curry), spinach and eggs.

Lunch
Ezekiel Golden Flax sprouted grain cereal with blueberries, vanilla almond milk, and stevia-inulin blend.

Dinner
At Village Burger, I had a Moroccan burger (patty made with peanut sauce and Moroccan spices (tumeric, I'm sure, but I have no idea what else), aioli, lettuce, tomatoes, red onion - pickles removed) and sides of cajun fries and onion rings. It was delicious, but the presentation (cheap cardboard containers on a puke-colored tray) forbade a picture.

Snack
On a friend's recommendation, Kashi Chocolate Almond Butter cookies, and dark chocolate Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.

Liquid Intake   

   Coffee:  30 oz,  Water:  52+ oz.

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January 4, 2013 - Fast Day

January 4, 2013 (Friday)
(Post 699, Day 4 of 2013, 735 days since starting this blog)

Daily Comment

In a follow-up to yesterday's post, the band got together for one last night of music before the hiatus, and we had a great time, worked up some new material, then performed at one of the  open mics I mentioned, that won't otherwise be providing an opportunity for me to play at. And we talked about when we'd book the next gigs, and stuff. All good.

Then I got down to the business of continuing on with my life. I fixed the alarm-clock problem, somewhat luxuriously/excessively by purchasing one of the units that will also dock/play/charge my iPhone. Not the cheapest option, but a good one for me.

I also did some end-of/start-of-the-year financial stuff, and that was nice, because the year ended well, and the re-balancing I do annually also is off to a good start. I have, for decades, built my own spreadsheets to track anything to do with numbers (investments, weight, etc.). I enjoy that, as weird as it is - or maybe not so much for a summa cum laude Math major.

This post, I see, is more rambling, more diffuse, and, therefore, possibly less interesting than most.

So, I'm grateful to you for reading, and please accept my apology.

Oh, and, Happy Birthday, Andy!

  

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First-half year 2013 daily weight from December 31, 2012

Food and Diet Section

 Today's Weight:        203.4 lbs 

Yesterday's Weight:    205.0 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:     - 1.6 lbs

Diet Comment

A fast day after the year's first weight loss.

Food Log

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch
Skipped.

Break-fast snack
Pepperoni.

Dinner
Sprng Mix, red cabbage and home-made spicy mayonnaise; Dal tadka (lentil curry); broccoli slaw; and baby carrots and more of the mayonnaise.

Snack
Pepperoni.

Liquid Intake   

   Coffee:  30 oz,  Water:  112+ oz.

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January 3, 2013

January 3, 2013 (Thursday)
(Post 698, Day 3 of 2013, 734 days since starting this blog)

Daily Comment

My band is going on a ten-week hiatus, and I love them a lot and it is unavoidable (the leader of the band is having surgery for carpal tunnel syndrome) and I find myself more than a little upset at the prospect.

That's what comes from thinking about the future. In the present (all we actually have, and we can never hold on to it), everything is fine.

I'm grateful, as the good Buddhists say, for every dark night that turns into a new sunrise. Yet, when I regard the prospect of future sunrises, it puts me in the uncertain future, one where alarm clocks don't work so you miss those sunrises.

My alarm clock doesn't work, and hasn't since I got back from North Carolina, two weeks ago. I bought a replacement from Amazon, it was DOA, I'm waiting for the return process to start, and have to buy a new one this weekend.

But I digress.

My band is on hiatus, and the prospects of playing have been substantially reduced, thanks to a couple of changes in open mic schedules (one is down to once-a-month, and only sometimes, one moved to the same night as another, one changed the host band and is now incompatible with jamming - bands, or solo artists only). Since I have become somewhat addicted (as in, dependent) on ensemble playing opportunities, this means that this year, I can only reliably depend on one or two nights a week of playing.

That's not enough for me. I need something else to take its place, and must accept whatever comes my way.

But I will have to fight my tendency to fill those gaps with passivity, for example, TV.

  

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First-half year 2013 daily weight from December 31, 2012

Food and Diet Section

 Today's Weight:        205.0 lbs 

Yesterday's Weight:    204.4 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:     + 0.6 lbs

Diet Comment

 Eating lunch out, so minimal breakfast. Unfortunately, I got tired, and stayed up late, and ended the day with a little cereal cheat.

Food Log

Breakfast
Chia gel.

Lunch
At Ling-Ling Chinese Buffet:

From the "Mongolian Grill", chicken, pork, bean sprouts, cabbage, onions, peppers, broccoli, mushrooms in garlic and hot pepper sauce. And kimchi (new spelling found while researching - unsuccessfully - for local buying sources). Not shown: Brussels sprouts.

Dinner

Chili (organic ground beef, mushrooms, diced tomatoes, black beans and spices) with peas. Not shown: Sprng Mix, red cabbage and balsamic vinaigrette.

Liquid Intake   

   Coffee:   20 oz,  Water:  84+ oz.

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January 2, 2013

January 2, 2013 (Wednesday)
(Post 697, Day 2 of 2013, 733 days since starting this blog)

Daily Comment

Is it time for me to mention that I have 1,122 days left before I put an end to my status of employee?

OK - too soon. You'll hear from me near the end of the month when there are only three years left.

I had the opportunity to extend some help, counsel, and comfort to a musician acquaintance who is struggling with employment issues. I'm grateful for the opportunity to help, to be of service.

  

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First-half year 2013 daily weight from December 31, 2012

Food and Diet Section

 Today's Weight:        204.4 lbs 

Yesterday's Weight:    205.2 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:     - 0.8 lbs

Diet Comment

Better than nothing. Eating lunch out, so minimal breakfast. Unfortunately, I got tired, and stayed up late, and ended the day with a little cereal cheat.

Food Log

Breakfast
Chia gel.

Lunch
At Ruby Tuesday's:

From the salad bar: Spring Mix greens, baby spinach, broccoli, peas, mushrooms, ham, bacon, hard-boiled egg, blue cheese dressing. I also made another trip, leaving out the ham and bacon, and with ranch dressing.

Spaghetti squaxh and a turkey burger with lettuce, tomato and mayonnaise.

Snack
Celery with home-made spicy mayonnaise.

Dinner

Chili (organic ground beef, mushrooms, diced tomatoes, black beans and spices) with peas. Not shown: Sprng Mix, red cabbage and balsamic vinaigrette.

Snack

A hard-boiled egg with guacamole, Ezekiel Golden Flax sprouted grain cereal with almond milk and a little stevia-inulin blend.

Liquid Intake   

   Coffee:   20 oz,  Water:  104+ oz.

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January 1, 2013 - Fast Day, Travel Day

January 1, 2013 (Tuesday)
(Post 696, Day 1 of 2013, 732 days since starting this blog)

Daily Comment

I have some ideas about things I want to address in 2013: 

I want to do something about my lack of exercise. So, I'm going to do something every day. I began today. I want to improve my general health.

Spanish is the language in four out of five of the countries on my expat list. So I want to learn to speak it. I took Spanish in high school, and hated it. Ultimately, I had to take it in Summer School to graduate. Now, I want to learn it; it isn't just the perceived easiest option to meet an arbitrary language requirement. I will be making the investment in a language course.

There are probably more pressing issues, things that may be more important. I don't know. These are the things that top my list at the beginning of the year. 

These are NOT New Year's resolutions. I stopped making New Year's resolutions about 40 years ago. I hate making promises that I'm not going to keep, or that will add stress to my life. 

And, moreover, if I don't get around to learning Spanish, or exercise only occasionally, in the scheme of things, that's okay. I have no deadlines here.

  

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First-half year 2013 daily weight from December 31, 2012

Food and Diet Section

 Today's Weight:        205.2 lbs 

Yesterday's Weight:    201.8 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:     + 3.4 lbs

Diet Comment

Yesterday's eating put some pounds on. Today's fast may take some off.

We'll see.

Food Log

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch
Skipped.

Dinner
I don't know what happened to the picture I took, but here's what I ate: Celery with home-made spicy mayonnaise, and turkey and wild salmon burgers with guacamole.

Snack

A salad of sliced hard-boiled eggs, Sprng Mix, red cabbage and balsamic vinaigrette.

Liquid Intake   

   Coffee:   38 oz,  Water:  123+ oz.

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December 31, 2012 - Cheat Day

December 31, 2012 (Monday)
(Post 695, Day 366 of 2012, 731 days since starting this blog)

Daily Comment

As the New Year winds down, I am struck again, by the difference between my experience of the passage of time and the reality that there is only the eternal now, what Seth/Jane Roberts calls the Moment Point in simultaneous time.

That is what gets celebrated, And it happens, of course, simultaneously for everyone.

Back in the experiential world, I was finally able to wish my son Happy New Year face-to-face with Facetime (Apple's version of Skype) at 9:15 PT, right before I nodded off myself.

I find myself looking forward to 2013 optimistically. I guess, Andy, I am wired for that. 

  

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Year 2012 daily weight from December 31, 2011

Food and Diet Section

 Today's Weight:        201.8 lbs 

Yesterday's Weight:    204.0 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:     - 2.2 lbs

Diet Comment

Well, there it is: Net on the year, +1.8 pounds.

I can live with that. We'll see what 2013 brings. I'm going to stay conscious of my food intake, maybe do a few less cheat days, or change to the two cheat-meals per week plan. I haven't decided. Anyway, it isn't something I'm going to think about today.

Food Log

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch
At Genki, a Japanese restaurant near the movie theater:

Udon noodles (with chicken, shrimp, crab, tofu, mushrooms, seaweed, carrots an egg and, of course, udon noodles in miso broth) and shrimp and sweet potato tempura on the side.

Snack
At the theater seeing Silver Linings Playbook, Snow-Caps.

Dinner
At a Chinese restaurant (tradition, tradition!) with good food and poor service in Sharon, Mass, we shared boneless spare ribs, scallion pancakes, shrimp bites, scallops with black bean sauce, Szechuan pork and sesame beef. All very good.

Snack
At the Dedham Theater seeing the 9th Annual New Year's Eve Comedy Extravaganza, Reese's Pieces.

Liquid Intake   

   Coffee:   24 oz,  Water:  54+ oz.

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December 30, 2012

December 30, 2012 (Sunday)
(Post 694, Day 365 of 2012, 730 days since starting this blog)

Daily Comment

I've been thinking a lot, lately, about time. Specifically, how the passage of time has affected me, and, more often, the nature of time.

First, the thing that makes me happiest right now, and by that I mean the thing that most easily puts me in the now moment, is playing music. But my development as a musician seems to have stopped. I'm playing now, stylistically and technically, much the same way I played 35 years ago. I think I am playing better, but only because, over time, it has become almost effortless.

I reject more modern styles and techniques, because that is not how I hear bass. But I no longer try to keep up with modern styles, or the current popular music.

I've lost interest in progressing. I like to tell people, I'm no longer a competitive bassist; by which I don't mean that I don't have the talent and skill to compete, rather, I mean I don't have any drive to compete - I play bass for the joy I get in making music, not to 'get the gig' or to get laid or for fame or fortune, or to impress other musicians. And since I've gotten clear on that, I've traded the ego-stroking of proving myself to others for a bit of self-generated (well, in the context of an ensemble of other musicians) bit of joy, the ability to enjoy the moment when I play, with no thoughts of future or past pulling me out of it.That's not a fair trade, it's a bargain for me.

This past year (and the last one, too), I found myself, in playing and meditation, 'spending time' in situations where the past and the future were not influential.

And it gives me the perspective that I don't have to increase, don't have to do better, and don't have to  be concerned about it. And that sets off a chain reaction of thoughts.

On time. Because it has allowed me to get a real, in-my-heart certain view of time (and space) as the mind-created illusions they are. Can I see past time and space? No, because seeing is sensual and too limited, by definition. Living in the material world, the world of the senses, I work with what I perceive.

When I play, and, to a lesser extent, when I meditate, I get it, the simultaneity of all things. That is, I momentarily step out of it, in that my perceiving of the illusion ceases.

I take some comfort from knowing that the illusion can be seen for what it is, and that I can have joy and peace in those moments where the illusion and its hold on me is neutralized. 

  

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Year 2012 daily weight from December 31, 2011

Food and Diet Section

 Today's Weight:        204.0 lbs 

Yesterday's Weight:    202.6 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:     + 1.4 lbs

Diet Comment

Today's fast, short as it was, will hopefully undo yesterday's excess. Unfortunately, eating some dates (sugar) and a very small amount of breadcrumbs at dinner may have a negative effect.

So it goes.

Food Log

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch
Skipped.

Dinner
At Legal C-Bar, in Dedham, Mass:

I had a share of blackened sashimi tuna and salmon tartare appetizers.

Seafood casserole (scallops, shrimp, lobster, in a white wine sauce with cheese and a light breadcrumb topping) and garlic spinach. Not shown: An excellent house salad.

Snack
Bacon-wrapped dates with almonds (Joan-made).

Liquid Intake   

   Coffee:   32 oz,  Water:  88+ oz. and a shot of Jameson's.

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!